Awkward Awakenings
by ScaraMedn
Summary: Seven suspects, seven alibis, and dozens of suggestive comments. Nick finds himself in the middle of a mystery while vacationing at the Hopps' farm. Which of Judy's relatives has a taste for fox and how much will he resist when they start playing a very naughty game?


A/N:

This is a fun little romp that popped into my mind out of the blue. It's taken a good long while to finish this chapter, but I'm decently happy with it. There is more to come and I hope you see its potential. Feedback is always welcome.

* * *

Once or twice in his life, Nick had woken up to the feeling of soft lips on his manhood. Only once or twice. A rare and magical experience here and there to spice up the barroom bragging in his youth. A girlfriend of his during his brief stint at university was the first such experience. Another, a one-night stand that decided to stay for a second round during his early hustling days. Both were very fun, very satisfying, and very much in the long distant past.

To his knowledge, such an event required a willing participant—a date, girlfriend, spouse, even a passing interest during mating season could make sense. He had none of those. For one thing, it was summer. He had no girlfriend—certainly not a spouse. He hadn't even dated in close to two years.

He was very confused. Not unhappy, exactly. Just confused in that particular way of being half-asleep. Nothing felt or seemed quite real. It stuck in his mind that not all was right with the situation. However, Nick wasn't conscious enough to fully grasp what was happening, let alone respond in any meaningful way.

The attention was welcome, though. Whether it was a dream or not, it'd been a long time for the todd. Embarrassingly long. His last relationship had ended a few months before he'd been roped into the Nighthowler case. That was…

_Too long_, he thought around a soft moan.

He drifted towards waking on the tide of his own writhing. No matter how much he wanted to lay back and enjoy himself, whoever was playing with him knew what they were doing. They were pulling involuntary reactions out of him more and more as they teased him and he was getting close. So close...

Nick's eyes snapped open as an orgasm ripped through him. He was disoriented and confused to find his dream wasn't a dream. That cost him. Too late, he noticed the movement under the light blanket, headed towards the foot of the bed. Then the bedroom door to his right snapped shut, demanding his attention. Whoever it'd been was gone. He lifted the blanket and top sheet.

"No evidence," he murmured, glancing at the door.

He hopped out of bed and peeked underneath. No traces of anyone. Not even a dust bunny. Pulling on a pair of long athletic shorts, he looked the room over hoping to find some kind of clue. He came up dry very quickly.

The guest room in the Hopps warren was sparsely furnished. A bed, a bedside table, and a stand for a suitcase was all the room held. In fairness, the room was rarely used and if you were staying for long with the Hopps' you didn't stay a guest. Once they'd adopted you, there was a place for you reserved in one of the dormitory wings. The only reason he wasn't in his usual room was that Johann had finished his internship and needed his room back. Nick hadn't felt put out in the least. It wasn't as though he spent much time in his room when he visited the family farm with his partner.

A shirt slid over his head and his paw was on the doorknob when the door opened, smacking him in the knuckles. He yelped and shook his paw as his partner stuck her wide-eyed head through the semi-opened door.

"Nick! Wha-oh, no." She grabbed his paw, rubbing the appendage. "Of all the dumb luck."

"You're the one with the luck, Carrots," he replied by reflex. "I'm just the partner."

Her expression went flat, but her paws kept moving. "Oh, my. A rabbit's foot joke. How original."

Nick snorted and peeked down the hall. "Jokes seem to be in season."

"What," his paw fell free as his partner's voice went teasing, "Did someone play a prank on the sleeping fox?"

"Yea, let's go with that." Nick eyed his partner. "And where were you for the last ten minutes?"

She smirked and stepped into the hall, leading the way towards the kitchen. "I've been in the kitchen for the last two hours or so catching up with Mom. She'll vouch for me."

Nick hummed in response.

"You look flushed," Judy commented with a quirked brow. "What did they do? Sneak in and tickle your feet?"

Nick rolled his eyes to cover his spike in heartrate. "Nothing serious. They did manage to vanish without me being able to identify them."

"Ooh!" Judy scampered ahead of him to walk backwards, smiling cheekily all the while. "A nice little exercise for the aspiring detective. Aren't you lucky?"

"Lucky indeed," he muttered.

Fortunately, his comment was taken as sarcasm and Judy dropped the ribbing for other topics. Prank wars being fairly common in the Hopps' household, it didn't keep her interest for long. Moments later, she was chattering excitedly about something he ignored. Nick was far too busy puzzling over his visitor to pay attention—and enjoying the afterglow.

As he basked, he pondered.

There were no traces of his visitor in the room or hall. No witnesses, either. Everyone was so active in the house that tracking anyone's movements was a herculean task. No internal security cameras didn't help either; though it was an absurd notion. Nick knew he couldn't expect such security measures in a private residence. They didn't live in a bank, after all.

Even his sense of smell, good as it was, was useless. Any amount of breath-sniffing would be a waste of time. A strongly flavored snack would be enough to cover any scent he could identify. And rabbit pheromones were thick in the air as a matter of course, so he was effectively scent blind to the only other telltale aroma that he had to work with.

_Even if I wasn't_, he grumbled in his head, _It'd only narrow the suspects down to a few hundred. _

In the dining room, the usual chaos reigned. Kits, teams of field workers, and crews form the various workshops drifted through with the vague purpose of the hard working and hungry in a barely organized melee. Nick followed his partner through the throng and into the kitchens, where a little more sanity reigned. No one would dare upset the territory of the lady of the house.

There, to Nick's surprise, he found a sight he'd never seen before. It was a little unsettling. Seven rabbits sat around the little family table that Bonnie reserved for quiet, more intimate meals. The Hopps matron sat at the head of the table and chatted with the younger rabbits.

Eva was a little taller than the others and had hazel eyes just like her littermate, Paul, but his ears were missing the black tips. Tina and Marla were identical to each other in every way, right down to their baby blues, except for a white patch over Marla's left eye. Sandy was the shortest, beating Judy out by a single centimeter. She shared her sister's unusual eye color, but had a patch of tan brindling on her right paw. Otherwise, they looked exactly the same.

He'd met each of them over the duration of their partnership and friendship. They were all very similar to Judy—energetic, welcoming, and cheeky. With one or two around it was notable. With all six buns, including Judy, it was uncanny.

Judy trotted up to Eva and slugged her on the shoulder. "I'm still annoyed with you. You didn't tell me you were going to be visiting home this week!"

"I figured my little sister could handle a surprise," Eva cheeked back before winking at Nick. "I told her to let sleeping foxes lie, but you know Judy."

"He was already up, I'll have you know," Judy countered. "Someone beat me to the punch."

"A vacationing fox should not be up this early in the morning," Bonnie gently admonished.

"Unless, he has a good reason." Judy chirped back smugly.

"I did," the statement was out before Nick could think.

"A very good reason, if that blush is any indicator!" Eva crowed.

Nick groaned internally. "It's nothing."

Eva leaned in, grinning. "Then, why the blush?"

A quick glance around the room told Nick he had the full attention of the room. "It's embarrassing…"

Judy snorted. "Someone played a prank on him."

Marla giggled. "Someone got the drop on you!"

"Yes, yes…" Relief flooded Nick as he played off his reaction. "I'm mortal. The horror."

Eva smirked knowingly. "Flesh and blood is always better than bronze, Nicky."

Nick rolled his eyes at the reference. He was so distracted that he almost missed her near-whisper follow up.

"...or plastic."

Nick barely kept his expression in check at her words. They could have been innocent teasing, or a reference to something else. The uncertainty set his teeth on edge. His eyes flicked to Bonnie and he slid into his hustler persona. He had to confirm her story.

He smirked, trying to ignore everything else. "Judy rarely lets me sleep-in at the best of times."

"I do, too!" Judy scoffed.

"Fifteen extra minutes doesn't count." Nick rolled his eyes. "One would think that catching up with your family would take priority over dragging my carcass out of bed."

"I think you were already up, considering Judy was only gone for five minutes." Bonnie retorted for her daughter. "And after two hours I think we're caught up— For the moment anyway."

Everyone chuckled and Nick slid into a seat next to Sandy. "So, what have you all been up to this morning? Not waiting for me, I hope?"

"Hardly," Marla snorted from across the table. "We all just arrived."

The fox couldn't help but look around the table incredulously. "Seriously?"

"Uhhuh!" Tina chirped. "We all trickled in just in time for second shift breakfast!"

"How else would we avoid the duty roster?" Paul commented over his coffee mug. "By now, everyone is assigned and busy."

Bonnie swatted him. "You know you're on visitor duties while you're back home."

The buck groaned. "I know…"

"Come on, Paul." Tina giggled. "Are a few hours of kit wrangling such a chore?"

"It is, by definition, a chore," the buck deadpanned, "so yes."

Bonnie swatted his arm again as she stood and headed for the coffee maker. "Don't sass your cousin. She's visiting."

"So am I!" he whined.

"Yeah, Pauly." Sandy teased. "Pretend to be civilized for five minutes."

"I'm too far gone for that," he grumbled.

Marla snorted and leaned in to whisper-shout to Judy, "The doctorate program is destroying him!"

"I'll be more personable once I get to unwind a little." Paul wiggled an eyebrow at Nick.

Nick swallowed despite himself as Bonnie plopped a mug of coffee in front of him. "Thanks, Bonnie."

She patted his arm with a smile and turned to the table. "I've got work to do, so you all behave." Everyone snorted or laughed quietly and she added, "Except you, Nick. You just enjoy yourself."

"Lucky fox," Paul grumbled.

"And how!" Nick preened, trying to digest Bonnie's comment. He turned to Marla and Tina, forcing himself to relax. "So, what brings you two all the way out here? Paul's obviously desperate for a break, Judy and I are on holiday. Eva's… Unemployed?"

"I'm on summer break." Eva retorted tartly. "School's closed until mid-August, so even hard-working teachers like me get off."

Nick forcibly dragged his mind out of the gutter and focused on the twins. "So, what brings the Lops twins to the Hopps farm?"

The two does glanced at each other and grinned before turning back to the fox and saying in perfect sync, "Cross-training."

"Oh, great," Paul groaned. "They're doing it, again."

"We're here for a crash course in air drainage and terraced growing with Uncle Stu," they continued. "It'll help out when we get back home in fall for spring prep."

"You do know it's uncanny how you imitate that gum commercial, right?" Nick chuckled.

The two does wrapped an arm around each other, struck a saucy pose as he sipped and said, "Double your pleasure, double your bun."

Coffee shot out Nick's nose and the table dissolved into giggles.

He trotted to the counter to grab a paper towel. "You two are too good at that."

"We're also late for Uncle Stu," Tina said as she calmed her amusement. "Come on, Mar."

Tina and Marla got up and headed for the door, but paused before going through.

"Catch you later, Nick!" they crooned over their shoulders as they walked out in perfect lockstep, their hips rolling far more than necessary.

Nick forced his eyes off the undulating tails and continued to mop his muzzle. He had to get his mind out of the gutter.

"Those girls are ridiculous," Paul groused before shooting the rest of his coffee. "I'm off for a nap before nursery duty."

Nick blew his nose before answering. "I'll see you at dinner, then? We need to catch up on the world cup."

"Sounds perfect. There's no one in my department who follows it." He got up and dragged himself off toward the hall, pausing only long enough to slap Nick on the rump in passing. "Sorry. Too tired to reach higher."

Nick was willing to laugh the buck's behavior off as part of his "sporty" personality, except for the little smirk and quirk of the eyebrows he caught out of the corner of his eye.

Before he could say anything, Sandy hopped up and hugged him. "I've got nursery duty now, but I'll catch up with you at dinner. I've got a new dessert I need you to try."

"Finish your culinary course, already!" Judy called from the table.

Eva laughed into her paw. "You've been six credits from graduation for how long?"

Sandy huffed. "I've been working on my independent study!"

"For two years?" Judy teased.

Sandy stuck her tongue out at her sisters before pulling Nick down to whisper, "I've got a new recipe for blueberry custard pie. Topped with hot cream, it's irresistible. Once you get a taste, it's impossible to stop craving it."

Nick's brain seized for a moment, but he recovered. "I can hardly wait. Is it good for breakfast?"

"It's best as a snack!" she breathed into his ear.

And she was gone, leaving Nick blinking in her wake. It took an act of willpower to reinterpret everything she'd said in a non-suggestive light. To make matters worse, he had Judy and Eva snickering at him not five feet away. The two were as close to identical as you could get in non-littermates and thick as thieves. While Judy's aspirations had led her to the ZPD, Eva's desire to serve the public went towards education. More than once they'd featured in his lurid fantasies—alone, or as a pair—and the recollection of that fact made him take his seat very quickly.

Judy laughed, apparently misunderstanding his discomfort. "You shouldn't encourage her like that. She'll rope you into taste testing all of her weird cooking experiments."

Nick cleared his throat. "That may not be the worst thing. I'm a sucker for good pie."

Eva rolled her eyes. "It's good. I've tried it. But if you're thinking it'll be as rapturous as she makes it sound, you're mistaken."

He shrugged. "I'll take what I can get."

Eva snorted. "Don't we all?"

Judy rolled her eyes and flicked her sister's ear, giving Nick time to recover. His mind was firmly stuck in the gutter and it was doing him exactly no good. Any more and it'd end up in the sewer.

After breakfast, Nick was feeling slightly more himself. Pancakes, homemade marmalade, and a large blueberry soy-milkshake was exactly what the doctor ordered. He had the protein he needed to stay healthy and no one had to learn to cook bug sausage, or anything equally unpleasant. Not that he liked bug meat overmuch. It was nice every once in a while, but it played havoc with his breath. Canids had a reputation and "dog breath" was not something he condoned.

Banishing his visitor and the avalanche of innuendo from his mind was a chore, but he managed it. At least, he got through the banter accompanying his meal with no further worries about tents and pitching. Judy and Eva joked around with him until Eva had to help tutor some of the kits and Judy headed out to the fields.

With the last of his companions gone and his meal eaten, Nick felt a strong need for a shower. If there was one thing he appreciated at the Hopps' Farm—after the blueberries, the cooking, the clean air, the blueberries, the quiet and the blueberries—it was the showers. The huge Hopps clan needed a commensurately huge hot water supply and there was a shower in the guest room large enough for him. At the farm he had a shower stall that came up to just past his head height and plenty of room to move. Compared to the shower in his apartment—which was tiny and had an equally small water heater—it was heavenly.

Returning to his room he closed the door, shucked his clothes, and hopped into the shower without a care in the world. For a half-second Nick considered locking the washroom door, but shook the notion off. No one was going to interrupt him. Or so he thought right up until his head was covered in shampoo.

The door clicked open and closed quickly and quietly. Nick barely heard it. Erring on the side of caution, he started to rinse his face. If someone needed him for something, the least he could do was stick his head out. With water in his eyes he reached out of the stall, groping for his towel and found it grabbed.

Several things happened very quickly. His paw was lifted over his head and guided to the wall of the shower stall over his head. A wet towel was expertly wrapped under his jaw and up, crosswise over his eyes and head. As a final stunner, Nick felt a small, pad-less finger land on his lips. He was blind, but could breathe, and had company.

The cop part of him wanted to subdue whoever it was and get answers, but two facts stopped him. One was the touch. His visitor had shown no signs of ill intent. Their actions had been firm, but gentle and this was reinforced as he was pressed back against the wall. He couldn't imagine any of the Hopps' harming him, either. The other thing that stopped him was the paw sliding down his stomach towards his sheath.

In a rush of fear, Nick reached for the towel. His paws were stopped by a pair of paws and guided back to the lip of the stall. The towel was gently tugged back into place and held there. It took him a moment to realize that while all this was happening, the paw on his stomach hadn't disappeared. The realization froze him in place, which seemed to be what they were waiting for.

The paw on his stomach wasted no time in sliding over his sheath and beginning to tease him. It was joined by a second paw moments later. Between understanding that there were two mammals in the shower with him and the very real attention to his manhood, Nick couldn't have stopped his arousal if he'd tried. He didn't bother. The situation he found himself in was one of the most exciting he'd ever experienced. It intensified as a pair of soft lips, a tongue and buck teeth descended on the tip of his manhood and slid down to the knot.

Nick's mind went blank.

Unlike that morning, he was completely conscious, so there was nothing to blunt the sensations. The inability to see only added to the thrill. Their pace was achingly slow, but somehow that slow build made it better. From tip to knot and back took several seconds and it did not stop. Whoever was doing this was in no rush. They were enjoying every second of it.

Sensing Nick's excitement, his visitor brought their paws into play, but didn't increase their tempo. Deft fingers played over his knot, coaxing him closer and closer, teasing him until he couldn't help but shift his hips forward. He was desperate for more and close enough that he knew he would pop if he could just get that tiny bit more.

The lips slowed their action.

Nick groaned in frustration. He was right on the edge and all but writhing with need. He felt a paw land on his own, stopping his desire to use them before it formed. A tongue danced over the head of his manhood and he bucked forward by reflex. The lips didn't move and for an instant he had a little of the pleasure back. He thrust again, this time with purpose, and was rewarded by another wave of sensation. Quickly, he found his rhythm, plunging into the waiting mouth of a mystery rabbit, blindfolded in the shower while another held his paws up and away.

An orgasm ripped through him as he buried himself in his mystery partner's throat.

For a moment, he forgot how to breathe. Through the euphoria he heard a muffled moan from below him and a satisfied sigh by his ears. Nick felt his knees wobble and he slid down the wall to rest on them. Before he could do or say anything else. He felt kiss to the underside of his jaw, followed by a kiss to his cheek. He whipped the towel off his face just in time to see the tip of one ear and a cotton tail vanishing out the door, through the steam.

Nick snatched the towel from the rack and sped after the fleeing rabbits, only to be brought up short at the doorway. He was dripping on the floor, wearing only a towel, panting, and still shaky. Hardly ideal circumstances for a pursuit, especially when his targets had the homefield advantage.

He snorted in irritation and returned to the bathroom. Ten minutes later he was toweled dry and five after that, blown dry. He tried not to think too much about anything to do with "blowing". With a final check of the bathroom for any evidence—there was none—he hung up his towel and returned to his bedroom.

Judy was there. "Carrots!"

And he was naked.

"Nick!" Her eyes bugged slightly, darting quickly down and up. "Hello."

He blinked in confusion. "Hiiii..."

Judy swallowed. "That wasn't a greeting."

"Oh." He glanced down, finally shaking off his surprise. "Oh!"

Judy quickly turned her back while Nick snatched some clothes from his duffel and retreated to the bathroom to dress. A few moments later he reentered his bedroom, fighting an embarrassed blush. It was a small consolation to see his partner was equally flustered. The pink in her ears was adorable and it would have been easier to appreciate if she didn't look like she was trying not to laugh at him.

"Something funny, Carrots?"

"Um, no…" She cleared her throat awkwardly. "Not really. I, uh, didn't know you were feeling quite _that_ stressed."

He walked to his bag, rooting around for his phone. "What are you talking about?"

"It's just, well…" Judy's hesitation made him very glad he wasn't facing her directly.

He feigned annoyance. "Out with it, rabbit. Why do you think I'm stressed?"

Judy visibly swallowed, failing to meet his eyes. It was clear she was regretting her comment, but she'd committed and there was no way out of it now. Just to reinforce the idea, Nick moved to stand between her and the door. He crossed his arms and fixed her with a bland, expectant stare. Her blush intensified adorably.

"I…" Judy cleared her throat and steeled herself. "I can smell your pheromones. I know you were… 'working a knot out' in the shower. Y'know… So, to speak."

Nick's eyes widened, not just because she knew a vulpine euphemism for masturbation, but the fact that she knew what sex smelled like on him. As he stared in shock, his partner started babbling. He let her speed talk herself five shades redder in the ears and cheeks before he felt he could respond without embarrassing himself any further.

"Whoa! Judy, enough." Nick wave his paws around cutting her off. "Please, stop before we both combust from embarrassment."

She squeaked, "Sorry," through her paws.

"Don't be, but I have to ask. What made you think I was… Oh, fuck it." Nick walked to his bed and plopped onto it to sit. "Why did you think I was jerking off in the shower?"

"I told you. I can smell your pheromones." She smiled uncomfortably.

He wanted to massage his temples. "So, you know whenever anyone does that?"

Judy's headshake was very firm and fast. "Only if I know them pretty well. Rabbit noses aren't as good as a fox's, say, but we're predisposed to notice certain scents. Like the one I smelled on you this morning and… um… again just now."

Nick's ears burned cherry red. "This morning…"

Judy held up her paws, interrupting, "I figured someone pranked you by interrupting you… you know… relieving some stress."

"So close and yet so far…" he griped into his paws.

"I am?" her voice cut through his attention like a knife.

Realizing too late he'd spoken out loud, Nick resigned himself to his fate. He knew Judy wouldn't stop until he explained. It was the last thing he wanted to do, but he knew it was inescapable. Her stubborn refusal to let go until she got the whole story made her a great investigator and an infuriating busybody. Between her and Clawhauser, gossip had never been more plentiful, or more accurate, at the precinct.

"My sleep was interrupted. Nothing else."

Judy shrugged, but her interest was only growing. "Then, why did you smell like one-mammal rutting?"

"I don't think I did, but you're probably scent-blind to the rest of it." Nick raked his palms over his face and bulled on. "I was woken up this morning by someone trying out a lip lock on my love muscle." As her eyes grew to dinner-plate size, he continued. "And I had a visit in the shower before you arrived with much the same result."

She was suddenly laser-focused. "Who?!"

He shrugged, shaking his head. "I don't know."

"Wha- How could you not know!?" Agitation colored Judy's increasingly louder words.

Nick gauged his response carefully, watching her reaction. "The first time, they stayed under the covers and were gone before I could get my head together."

"Uhhuh." Her words and expression were flat, simmering just shy of angry.

Nick knew that look. His partner was a long foot away from diving into a hunt. She never called it that, and she'd be incensed if she knew he did, but it was the only word he knew to describe it. Being a prey animal, she didn't have what would commonly be referred to as "predatory instincts". No one would ever dare claim that out loud. That didn't stop her from being just as single-minded and relentless as a pred on the hunt. The precinct shrink called it an obsessive-focus streak in her personality. That was all well and good in her official file, but Nick knew better and everyone in the precinct agreed. The Bunny could hunt.

Nick leaned back, easing the tension in the room. "I was half asleep. It was kind of disorienting to discover I wasn't dreaming."

"And in the shower?" she pressed.

Nick sighed. "Well, one of them-"

Her response was instant. "One?"

He mentally berated himself before responding very calmly. "There were two."

"Two?!" Judy was practically shouting.

"Yes, two." Irritation crept into his voice. "One held a towel over my eyes and occupied my hands while the other was busy elsewhere."

Her paws flopped against her thighs. "Unbelievable."

Nick snorted. "I can't help but agree."

If looks could kill, the look Nick's comment earned him would have vaporized him on the spot. "Judy, why are you so angry?"

"This is a problem, Nick." The iron in her voice told him the cause was lost. She was going hunting and there was nothing he could do about it.

He stopped hiding his annoyance. If she was on the warpath, there was no stopping her. If she felt she was overreacting, there was a chance she'd think twice before causing too much trouble. "I'd call it a puzzle, not a problem."

She scoffed incredulously. "Aren't you curious who's been molesting you?"

"I'm curious, but not angry." Nick leaned back on his palms. "I can only speak for myself, but I don't see anything to complain about here. I want to know who's behind this, but it's just idle curiosity."

She was looking at his like he was an idiot. "So, you're fine with this?"

"Sure." He let his smile drip satisfaction. "Why aren't you?"

Her face dropped. "You're kidding."

Nick lifted his eyebrows. "If I'm fine with it, why are you angry?"

She gabbled, uncomprehending. "It's… inhospitable!"

A little shiver rolled up his spine. "It'd say it's exactly the opposite of that."

"It's taking advantage of a guest," she shot back hotly.

"Your mother tells me every time I visit that I'm part of the family." Nick couldn't help but smirk. "And you're grasping at straws." As her little fists balled, he just gave up. It wasn't a fight worth having. "Jude, seriously. If it upsets you that much, go investigate. I'm poking around, too, but I'm not out for blood or anything. I just wanted to know who I owe the 'thank you' to."

Nick felt a little bad about winding Judy up. He understood a little of why Judy was upset, but not to the degree she was. Especially, considering her "look but don't touch" policy when it came to their coworkers and the various romances that came and went in the precinct. She didn't interfere in any of the little dramas that unfolded at work and claimed it was part of how she was raised. Something about a house rule Nick couldn't quite remember.

As that tidbit surfaced in his mind, Nick could only pause. If it was a house rule at the Hopps Farm to mind your own business, it didn't make sense that Judy would be on the war path. Ultimately, it was his issue. If he was fine with what had happened, then she shouldn't be quite so incensed on his behalf.

Shaking his head, Nick wandered off to continue his investigation. He knew Judy would beat him to the culprit. It was her family and if anyone knew where to start, it was her. Nick was content with this. If she did the legwork, he'd still know who to thank.

Judy stalked down the hall with a purpose. She was upset. She knew it. Not why exactly, but there was definitely some unhappy in the little grey bunny as she stomped into the kitchen. There, to her surprise, she found Eva.

The older bun glanced up from her coffee and was instantly concerned. "Judy! Is something wrong?"

"Yes!" She vaguely waved a paw at the hall she'd just exited. "Someone's been molesting my partner."

Eva's eyebrow rose fractionally. "Is he upset?"

"No," Judy scoffed. "He's almost preening."

"Oh! Good for him, then." Eva gave a little shrug and took a sip of her coffee.

Judy couldn't believe her ears. "Wha- Is that all you can say?"

"No, but it's all I will say." Eva set her coffee mug on the table as she looked Judy in the eyes. "Jude, you know the rules of the house." She leaned back in her chair, brushing an ear over her shoulder and counting off on her fingers. "Handle your relationships. Mind your own business. No anger by proxy. And know what you're talking about."

"I know the rules," Judy barked back, "but this is different. It's Nick."

"And how is that different?" Eva's chin came to rest in her palm as her elbow plopped onto the tabletop. "Are you dating him? No. Are you angry? Yes. Is he upset? I think you said he wasn't..."

"No," Judy grumbled. "He's curious, but not upset."

Evangeline's empty paw lifted in a pals-up shrug. "Then, you have no reason to butt in and no reason to be angry on his behalf."

"It's not right!" Judy persisted. "He's a guest. Even if Mom says he's part of the family, he's still a guest and he's being taken advantage of."

"You may be right, but he's only curious, isn't he?" Eva countered. "Not mad? Or hurt?"

"No…" Judy sat heavily in the chair beside Eva and sulked. "He even argued that he didn't feel it was 'inhospitable'."

Eva giggled. "Well, that's fine, then, isn't it?"

"It still feels wrong," Judy replied unhappily.

Eva took another sip of her coffee. "Why?"

Judy blinked at her sister's question. It was a good question. She knew the rules better than anyone and had enforced them for years before leaving home. They also were very simple and non-negotiable. Bonnie had created them to teach her kits respect for each other's privacy in the crowded warren, but also to prevent feuds, grudges, and bad blood from forming in the house over fleeting teenaged romances. Now, Judy was breaking the rules herself and it didn't sit well with her.

Knowing where it was about to go, Judy groaned to herself and said "I don't know and don't start."

Evangeline crossed her arms and smiled. "I know you aren't a kit, anymore, so you know what your reaction looks like."

"I do not have an interest in him." Judy scoffed. "I mean, I saw him naked-"

Eva leaned forward, her eyes wide as she cut in, "You what?"

"Accident! It was an accident." Judy let her eyes roll freely. "It was embarrassing, but I didn't feel the desire to jump his bones."

The smile deepened to a grin. "Did you blush?"

"Of course, I did." Judy rolled her eyes and started pacing. "You would, too!"

"I would," Eva admitted, "but I wouldn't turn away."

"How do you know I did?" Judy huffed.

Eva's expression went flat and she lifted a knowing eyebrow. "Didn't you?"

Judy sulked. "Shut up."

"What is the actual problem, Judy? Are you jealous?"

"No! I mean, he's handsome, but I don't think of him like that."

"Or, you didn't until today. Seeing a mammal naked can change that."

"It was a shock, not a turn-on. I'm serious!"

"Alright! Alright. I believe you. I don't understand, but I believe you."

"What's not to understand?"

"Judy, he's an older, intelligent, confident, charming male and he's right there in front of you. If I accept that you aren't interested in him—and I know you're interested in males—then, I have to wonder why you're still upset."

"I… I don't know…"

"Huh… Well, before you say or do anything else, I suggest you figure that out."

After dinner, Nick was vexed. He'd puzzled at it all day. There weren't many of the household who had the means, motive and opportunity. The schedule was strict on the farm and everyone had their roles. There was no shirking and no missed chores, or no dessert. I didn't matter if the culprit was a kit or an adult. Bonnie and Stu ran a tight ship and it showed. Sadly, that left nearly everyone on the farm occupied when he was visited that morning. The only ones who weren't accounted for were Bonnie's sister Angela who was visiting, Pop-pop Hopps, and the seven rabbits from breakfast.

Pop-pop could barely walk. Aunt Angela had hip issues, which had been exacerbated by chasing her grandkits all over the farm. Judy had an alibi, as did Bonnie. That left Evangeline, Tina, Marla, Sandra and Paul. Four females and one male, no mobility limitations and light assignments. Past that, Nick was stumped.

It was frustrating, but he couldn't risk making it sound like he was investigating anything, or he'd give himself away. Granted, Judy knew, but that was a double-edged sword. She'd go a-hunting and wouldn't tell anyone, but she was as likely she'd keep whatever she discovered a secret. aAs it was, she'd tell him.

He'd pieced together that they'd arrived haphazardly that morning. They'd all been absent and unaccounted for at different points, but that didn't mean much. A trip to the bathroom was just as likely an explanation as dropping in to wake him up and all he had to go on was the time he woke up. It could have been minutes. It had to have been. Bonnie confirmed that everyone had trotted off to their rooms in preparation for breakfast just before he'd come down. Only Judy had stayed to keep her company and they were all back before she went to get him. That was all he'd managed to uncover.

They all had the opportunity to pay him a visit, but the question remained: Why?

Their behavior that morning notwithstanding, not a single one of them had a motive. He could have very easily have been misreading everything they'd said as double-entendres and innuendoes. Every word could have been completely innocent and he was just misinterpreting.

Then, there was the shower to consider. Two of them were involved. That meant of the five rabbits remaining, two of them were in cahoots, possibly with a third. He couldn't be sure that there was only one rabbit in his room that morning, or that the one from his wake-up call wasn't also one of the visitors after breakfast.

He wanted to feel something other than perplexed, but he didn't. He thought briefly that he should feel violated, but he didn't. If anything, it was a bit ego-fluffing. And it was genuinely a thrill—practically a fantasy porno in real life. And, he had to admit sheepishly to himself, it had been a good long while since he'd enjoyed such attentions in any way. Annoyance gnawed at him. He didn't enjoy being kept in the dark, but he couldn't deny it was exciting. What he didn't understand was the secrecy.

Why did his phantom visitors run? The worst he'd do was ask them why they'd done what they'd done. He wasn't angry with them. Confused, certainly, but not angry. Hells, maybe he'd ask them to dinner.

He snorted to himself.

"Or not," he muttered.

He hadn't had a date in a long time, but he wasn't about to jump at the first female to show him a little interest.

"Or male," he amended.

He pinched the bridge of his muzzle and groaned. This wasn't helping. Male or female didn't matter. Whoever they were, they weren't likely to come back. There was no way for him to figure out who they were and he'd wouldn't get another chance, so the rest of it was immaterial. He believed that for all of the five minutes it took him to walk from the kitchen to his bedroom, where he found a note pinned to his pillow.

It was typed, printed on common printer paper, and Nick was sure that it would match up to one of the twenty printers in the warren. So much, so obvious. There were no other markings on the sheet. For a moment he considered dusting for prints. That thought made him stop mid-thought. He was on holiday. The whole point was disconnecting from work. He was supposed to be relaxing.

"And I don't have a dusting kit," he grumbled quietly.

He sighed.

With a head shake Nick grabbed the note, carefully set the pin aside, and laid down. He bolted upright a moment later, unable to believe what he was reading.

Dear Nicky-

Here's the deal. We're enjoying this little game. We want it to continue.

Here are the rules:

You don't get to know who we are. You may have an idea, but you don't get to know for certain.

The blindfold is mandatory. See rule 1. It's also part of the fun.

When we visit and what you'll get when we visit you is a surprise. We'll respect your limits, but otherwise it's our choice.

This is our little secret. From here forward, no more kiss-and-tell.

Break the rules and the game ends. Rather obvious, we know. However, before anything else happens, it's decision time. It's your choice whether you keep getting visits, or not. You can walk away at any time, including now. If you aren't interested, leave the note on your pillow and we'll collect it, no hard feelings. If you want to play, make sure this note isn't on your pillow when you go for dessert.

Eagerly,

3

Whatever Nick had been expecting was blown away as he read the note for the fourth time. He glanced at the door, stood, and padded to his duffel. The notebook he always had on him for work was tucked into a pocket, as always when he was off duty. He pulled it free, ripped out a single, small page and dug out a pen. Five minutes later, he was in the dining room eating cobbler with one a printed note in his pocket and a scribbled one on his pillow.


End file.
